Boost your Mood with Essential Oils

Do you often or occassionally feel sluggish or drained? Are you quite disturbed by recent hitches or maybe you’re just in need of an emotional boost. The scent of essential oils could be just the shot-in-the-arm you need.
It’s general knowledge that smell saturates our emotions and affects our feelings. “Good” smells can lift our spirits, while “bad” smells can yank us downhill or even upset us. As a matter of fact, the French word sentir means “to smell” and “to feel.” We have a propensity to “feel” scents rather than process them logically —understanding them more through associations and images than by rational methods. It’s because the human brain processes smells in its limbic region, which is principally responsible for our emotions. Amusingly, the limbic system is regularly called the rhinencephalon or “smell part” of the brain. Studies show that emotion and odors are directly related and have been established to generate some of the same electrical impulses.

Essential oils incorporate natural phytochemicals that bear impression on the limbic system. When you inhale the scent of an oil, the brain releases various neurochemicals to create physiological changes in body, mind and spirit. When you smell lavender, for example, serotonin gets released, producing a calming influence in the body.
Pure essential oils are extracted directly from plant parts, including flowers, leaves, stems and roots, as well as the rind of their fruits. Outside of their direct healing properties these oils simply smell good, make us feel happier and serve as great stress and pain relievers. The easiest and most common way to benefit from their essence is through aromatherapy—placing a few drops of diluted oil directly on your skin and inhaling the aroma. (Note: always cut the essential oil with a base oil—see suggestions below.) Or you can add drops to your bath or to a special aromatherapy diffuser, which heats the oil and allows the smell to permeate the room. Choose from a multitude of oils, ranging from bergamot (Citrus bergamia), which has a balancing effect, to sandalwood (Santalum album), which is known for its sensuous properties.

So the next time you feel the drain and slug, take this friendly advice- mend your mood with the smell of essential oils.

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Giving Honest Friendly Remarks

Do you often struggle to give candid remarks to people? Or, do you always have the guts to give remarks to others honestly? They say that pretentious remarks are loud and easy while sincere comments are often kept secret or whispered subtly. Because real friendship is a silent relationship between individuals who value each other, honesty in opinions regarding your friends should be expressed in private or forever be silent. But there are risks in relationships. If you really value the other person, you have to somehow get your truth across.

Being truthful with your friends can be easier said than done at times. When you are confronted with a topic that could possibly end your friendship, you hustle between telling the truth and avoiding the truth to spare their feelings. Being straightforward with your friend becomes a tug of war of morals and salvaging what you are afraid to unveil. Here are some realistic approaches to overcome this dilemma:

Relationships are about levels of commitment or as they say in the business world your SLA (service level agreement). Remind your friends that you respect them enough to let them know the truth even if it hurts. Emphasize that your true friends tell you things you don't want to hear to save them the embarrassment of discovery from those who want to conspire against them. At times your friends will not take well your candor. Respect the way they perceive what you have to say to them and don't judge their response to you. Allow them to feel mad or upset or frustrated. Being a good friend is being honest and then being there for your friend when that honesty becomes a blow to his ego.

Keep in mind that honesty is the baseline for all healthy relationships because it gives rise to trust and trust eventually builds respect. At times it might be hard to tell your friend the truth, however if you phrase it in a manner that shows real concern and respect, you will most likely receive a warm positive feedback rather than a cold defensive response. Because people always seem to ask others about personal issues, sometimes being honest with them can come across as being mean. But if you want to help someone without being harsh you should read and try some of these tips. They will surely help your friend and also help keeping that friendship.

• You should always be honest with your friend or partner at all times. This will help you gain trust with each other and will let the other know that you really care about each other.
• Make sure you take into consideration the type of friend you are talking to when giving your opinion. If you know that he or she is sensitive about others opinions you should be careful about how you express yourself.
• Always give the person CONSTRUCTIVE criticism. Try not to be brash and give deconstructive opinions. If they just did a show or song and they want to hear your opinion always say something like, "That was good, it really was, but..." Never tell the person that it was downright awful or just try something different. Some call it tough love but it is really being down right mean.

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A Happiness Poem

If a happiness poem could bring forth a smile,
Then my face would always dress in style.

If my ears could hear my computer screen,
From one to another, they, too, would grin.

My keyboard types for my eyes not my tongue
This happiness poem will never be sung.

But what of my eyes? Don't they shine?
Yes, but not from this poem of mine.

The pen is mightier than the sword,
But a pen can write only words.

The feelings I sense and the senses I feel
For keyboard and screen remain far too real.

My ears and my nose remain at rest.
My cheeks and hairline are doing their best.

But if this happiness poem could make my mouth smile,
My face would forever dress up in style.

Author: David Leonhardt is author of a self-help happiness book. He also runs a Liquid Vitamins Store and serves as a SEO/SEM website marketing consultant

Ask Yourself: How Do I Want To Live?

Here is the usual question we ask kids around us, "What do you want to be when you grow up?" Of course you remember that question well. And the expected answers would be given: a nurse, a policeman, a scientist, a doctor, a President, an engineer, a businessman, superhero, etc. The fact is that people have varied exposures, interests and talents. Somebody may be just as contented being an architect as a teacher. But then, I suppose the better question to raise is "How do you want to live?" Do you want to live in a manor or a cottage? Do you want a sports car or mountain bike? Do you want to live in the metropolis, in the countryside, on a farm, on a high-rise condo? The consequence here is that you have to choose what you want to do by establishing your response on how you want to live your life. Generally, people do get hold of what they ask and work for. Actually, I just stumbled upon an old friend from high school who was my lab partner in biology. He wanted to be a podiatrist, which was great since I really didn't want to dissect that swine. He did everything. Guess what he's doing today? Okay, he's not a podiatrist, but he is a neuro-surgeon. He became a doctor nevertheless. My other friend always wanted to be in the construction and now he owns a very flourishing construction firm. The next one used to hang around internet cafes, now he is in the online business - a web developer and online marketer. Think backwards and you will most likely find out that most people, who pursued what they wanted, realized their aspirations. Therefore it's so crucial to have the right goals. Pursue dreams that will give you the future you want with your career. But do not forget something that's equally important - the quality of your off-time and family life as a man or a woman. If you really love helping people, teaching children, doing social work, or being a camp counselor, that's wonderful and grand! But if you, at the same time, want to live in a huge house by the shore, then you will be dissatisfied that the teacher salary isn't going to let you live in that manner. It's a blend of what you want to do and how you want to live. Pick one of the things that you love to do, that will pay for how you want to live. As you strive towards your dream, keep on asking yourself: How do I want to live my life? There's greener trend that draws your real aspirations to your best self.

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True friends are not dream-slashers

The secret to choosing the right friendships for you,
starts with a short friendship poem by The Happy Guy

Choose friends wisely, the portrait they paint
Is who you are and who you ain't.
Friendship is life's great support
When friends are of the right sort.
For all your dreams do they make room,
Or bring you down with doom and gloom?
You will know a friendship is true
When it brings out the best in you.

It's true. You can tell a person by the company she keeps. Our friendships not only tell a lot about who we are -- they make us who we are.The friendship poem above says it all. You will know a friendship is true when it brings out the best in you.

Take a look at your friends. Do they bring out the best in you? That might seem like a silly question. We all tend to think, "Of course they bring out the best in me. I wouldn't be friends with them otherwise."

But stop and think why you are friends. Here are a few common reasons why people become friends:

• Common background, sharing a comfort level in company from "the same side of the tracks".
  
• Common current situation, being able to discuss parenting, home renovations, or some other major life circumstance.
  
• Common interest, such as cards, bowling, hunting, etc.
  
• For shy people, a person who actually approached you is a candidate for friendship.
  
• For leaders, somebody who seems content to follow is a likely candidate. Somebody you spend time with anyway, such as a colleague, sibling, etc, often becomes a friend.
  
• Somebody you see frequently anyway, such as a neighbor, store clerk, etc, could become a friend.
  

These are just a few reasons people choose friends. It is the easy, natural way, but it is not always in our best interest. Sure, we should always want to get along with colleagues, neighbors, siblings, and anybody else.

But we should choose our friends, the people we open up to, very carefully. For instance, even a sibling can bring you down, pooh-pooh your dreams and load you up with negativity. "Ha! You think you can teach? What do you know about teaching?"

Even well-meaning friends can be dream-slashers. "Oh, do you really think you should go into business for yourself? I mean, what about security?"

On the other hand, some friends have a way of building up your dreams. "Go for it! You could really do well. And at worst, you'll at least have given it your best shot!"

Friends will often lend a hand. "Gee, I don't know much about fitness, but is there any way I can help you reach your goal?" Dream-slashers usually don't. "Hey, if you insist on pursuing this crazy scheme, leave me out of it."

A true friendship should:

• Encourage you to live your dream.
  
• Support you toward your goals.
  
• Sympathize for your losses and help you find a silver lining.
  
• Build your self-esteem.
  

If happiness and life-satisfaction are your goals, your friends should be chosen on the basis of how well they can accomplish those four goals. Happiness is a personal choice that comes from within. But, as my short friendship poem says, it sure doesn't hurt to have supportive friendships that help us achieve our goals.

Author: David Leonhardt is author of a self-help happiness book. He also runs a Liquid Vitamins Store and serves as a SEO/SEM website marketing consultant

Nurturing Self-Confidence

A lot of people lack coolness when dealing with other people... and for some, any structure of social situation can be awfully complicated. Social contact whether it be work-related or personal life can be stressful making you extremely uneasy and unable to function the way you usually do. For some reason, we don't always know what to say when we meet new people. It's therefore, explicable that you might lack confidence in your encounter with new people. Choosing to take control and take action is a key to renewing confidence. It doesn't have to be immense and chilling like parachuting or white water rafting; small steps on a regular basis will have a major positive impact on your life.

Take a deep breath or a number of deep breaths. This will help calm you down and think about the situation before you react so you won't react in a way that you will regret later. It also gives you a moment to think about how you would like to proceed next when you are in a stressful situation. It will also help your heart and blood pressure slow down. I then feel more confident, happier, relaxed and better able to cope with the situation at hand.

Bring companions when you have to meet new people. You will probably feel much better about meeting them if you have a friendly face beside you, because you already know that your friend knows and likes you for who you are, so it softens the potential blow of being rejected by these new people. With a friend by your side, it doesn't matter what these new people are like; you will still have at least some support.

Be with people who make you feel good and appreciate you - minimize the time you spend with those who pick on your faults and weaknesses. Building self-confidence also means taking care of you. Identify activities which make you feel good; i.e. time out for coffee, a long walk, a round of golf. Then make time to make it happen.

Tackle small risks each day - do something which you wouldn't normally do. Visit a cybercafe shop or go to see a film on your own, try out a new recipe or speak to someone in a supermarket queue. These small, positive actions will build your confidence

Write a personal journal or weblog. You can write anything you want in them. You can write down the different things that happen to you throughout the day. You can write about the things that you are grateful for and that you accomplished. You can write down inspirationally quotes or favorite sayings. You can write whatever you want. I personally like to write down things that I accomplished like a success journal. I also like to write down inspirational quotes that will make my life better, motivate me when I am in a rut, or things that make me feel happier and more self confident. Lastly, I like to write down the things that I am grateful for.

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Friendship with Your Ex – Does It Work?

When a romance crumbles, it sucks. But after the painful knock down, you stand up and come to your senses, realizing that you may be better off without the guy/gal. However, you have known each other so well and both of you may not be ready to relinquish that friendship. Or maybe, the man or woman or both is secretly wishing for a reawakening.

Well, there has to be some way to maintain wholesome friendship with someone who was once romantically linked with you. Those who were able patch things up as friends gave these pointers to consider:

Be honest with your feelings -- and make sure he/she is, too. Becoming just friends with an ex is a knotty situation, particularly when one of you is still carrying a torch for the lost love. If one person can't abandon the old feelings they have for the other, whether it's love, hatred, jealousy, resentment or lust, you run into a problem when trying to stay friends. Even if you're able to get along after you break up, the friendship itself is not true and genuine because of those leftover feelings.

Reflect on the reasons and manner of your breakup. Sometimes you can be friends -- in the long run. But when the gash of a hostile clash, double-cross or cold-hearted dumping is still fresh, the very last thing you could do with is to attempt to be pleasant to the perpetrator. And if you're the one who broke a heart, don't look forward to her/him to want to hang around with you as friends. If it didn't end up in a melodramatic fashion, the friendship can often rekindle somewhat soon.

Discern your motives for friendship. It's essential to ponder on the pros and cons of this friendship actually working. Sometimes the motivation for friendship isn't really healthy: You want some kind of justification for all the years you spent with the relationship, or you think lessen the guilt about moving on, or you're still fixated on him/her. Maybe it is better to let go of the memory altogether than work on a friendship that will hold you back later.

Sometimes, you can remain civil and friendly, but being friends in the long run just doesn't work. Somewhere down the road both of you will end up in a new connection. When you have had an intimate relationship with a person, the boundaries of the friend zone have been breached and you can't just go back to pretending like you were never lovers, which isn't fair to your new love, in case.

Share your experience: Do you think it's possible to maintain a friendship with an ex? Have you tried it? How did it work out? Does financial status play a role? Does shopping help you totally forget the idea? Shed some light and share your encounter…

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